How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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