walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
