That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
