he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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