someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize