I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize