So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
