I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize