My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
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