Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
