Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Where did you get a picture of my penis
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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