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• (520): View more from Arizona

  Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  I'm moving there. Get me hired.

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• (309): View more from Illinois

  i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.

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• (903): View more from Texas

  Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.

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• (309): View more from Illinois

  I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.

  (1-309): View more from Illinois

  Tis the season.

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• (858): View more from California

  Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"

  (1-858): View more from California

  next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.

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• (225): View more from Louisiana

  Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious

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• (206): View more from Washington

  Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"

  (1-206): View more from Washington

  I feel so bad for your roommate

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  My breasts were aching with rage.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.

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• (713): View more from Texas

  Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.

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• (231): View more from Michigan

  It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.

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