We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
