I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
