is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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