i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.