My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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