I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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