chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Well I just put wine in my tea
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize