just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize