I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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