My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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