on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize