Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
