My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
