What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
