Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
