I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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