All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Randomize