He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
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She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
My vagina just clenched in fear
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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