Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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