well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize