where am i from again
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
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