But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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