If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
