you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize