I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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