the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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