well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
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