I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
