they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
