Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
