the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
