whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Randomize
