wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
