I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
There's always time for handjobs
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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