You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
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I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
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Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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