i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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