its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
did i just pee glitter
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
