drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
