Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize